Vacation is over. Back to the grind. I'm trying to get organized and figure out what this week holds. Didn't sleep well last night, woke up with a headache, and things aren't quite clicking along just yet. I'm hoping it'll get better as the day goes on.
Hoping to get a more substantive post up later today...but at any rate, we're back. Whew.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Sunday, March 27, 2011
To Sleep, Perchance To Dream...
I'm having trouble sleeping tonight, I'm not really sure why. It's been a long time since I've been this awake at midnight and not had caffiene to blame!
I had an interesting dream last night that has been rattling around in my head all day. I'm fairly certain it was inspired by the book I was reading before I went to sleep. I downloaded Roseanne Cash's autobiography from the library before we left for vacation, pretty much on a lark. It turned out to be a good read.
The chapters I finished up with last night were about her personal growth as an artist. She waxed poetic about words and concepts that generally don't get much play in the more logical thinking, pragmatic business crowd I'm often a part of. New age stuff doesn't get much stock in the courtroom, in case you didn't know. Just the facts, ma'am.
In the middle of one of her chapters, she referred to Jung and his apparent statement that people could have up to five "big dreams" in their lifetimes - dreams that signified a change or shift in consciousness or in patterns of thinking. I thought it was a fascinating thought, and it reminded me that I have one of his books at home that I've been meaning to read for ... well, several years now. May need to pick it up when I get back home. Anyway. She applied that statemenet to a dream that she had at one point that allowed her to move on to a new phase in her life.
I don't think my dream last night was anything of the sort, although it was still riddled with enough typical "dream" symbolism that it stayed with me after I awoke this morning. I dreamt of finding additional rooms in our house that had been there all along but I had somehow missed. Empty space to fill in a house that could certainly use it.
Now, when I say dream symbolism? You know I'm not talking about predicting the future here, right? Just sayin.
There are, however, symbols that show up in dreams that have been interpreted over time to mean certain things - classic test anxiety dreams, dreams of teeth falling out equating to an insecurity in personal appearance, tornados suggesting internal turmoil, among many others.
Anyway, I could be totally wrong, but I think the house is often symbolic of the self, with different rooms being symbolic of different aspects of your personality or pieces of your life. Taken a step further, dreaming of discovering a new room in your house is sometimes equated with finding new aspects of your personality, new traits or talents, exploration, things in that vein.
I'm fairly certain that the dream came from the book - she has lived a very different life from me, one dedicated to artistic pursuits, with music burned into her soul from the beginning. But more than that, she has a love of words, and her life's work is devoted to teasing out the right words, the right lyrics, the right phrase. How cool is that?
I've always loved words. God knows I use enough of them. But sometimes in the cacophony of everyday life, it's easy to forget how much I truly enjoy them, how awe inspiring it can be to read something that reshapes the way you look at life. Or a phrase that literally sings to you from the page. Phrases that are so amazing that they make you almost sad, because how could anyone ever write it better than that? I'm fairly certain the dream related to a love of words, and the amazement words sometimes brings me.
Or it could just mean I feel like we need a bigger house. Who knows.
Anyway, I just feel at loose ends tonight, and I've spent the evening with words, in one form or another. Apparently my brain needed to throw everything together and jumble it up and spit it back out before I could sleep. Fabulous. I'm sure I'll be thanking my brain in the morning when I read back over this and wonder what the hell I was thinking. Oh well. My space, my words.
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Quick Recap...
OK, so mostly hiatus.
A few quick bullets:
* Traveling with a 4.5 year old and a 6 year old is infinitely easier than traveling with younger kiddos. It's maybe no less exhausting, but certainly less frustrating.
* No matter how much I try to take pictures, I'm just not the picture taking type.
* I slept for nearly 10 hours last night.
* The kiddos have learned about all sorts of new transportation on this trip: planes, trains, autobmobiles, monorails, and boats!
* Is it a just a pop culture thing that whenever someone says "monorail," I automatically hear the citizens of Springfield break into the "monorail" chant?
* Up today: Final day at Magic Kingdom. There's still quite a bit we haven't seen.
* The girl likes roller coasters. Who knew.
* The boy likes nearly everything. Big surprise.
* Coolest ride so far? No idea. The Trial Track at Epcot was wayyyy cool because of the speed you get on the course, but the Thunder Mountain roller coaster at the Magic Kingdom was also pretty cool. I'm sure we're missing a bunch of stuff, but whatever.
A few quick bullets:
* Traveling with a 4.5 year old and a 6 year old is infinitely easier than traveling with younger kiddos. It's maybe no less exhausting, but certainly less frustrating.
* No matter how much I try to take pictures, I'm just not the picture taking type.
* I slept for nearly 10 hours last night.
* The kiddos have learned about all sorts of new transportation on this trip: planes, trains, autobmobiles, monorails, and boats!
* Is it a just a pop culture thing that whenever someone says "monorail," I automatically hear the citizens of Springfield break into the "monorail" chant?
* Up today: Final day at Magic Kingdom. There's still quite a bit we haven't seen.
* The girl likes roller coasters. Who knew.
* The boy likes nearly everything. Big surprise.
* Coolest ride so far? No idea. The Trial Track at Epcot was wayyyy cool because of the speed you get on the course, but the Thunder Mountain roller coaster at the Magic Kingdom was also pretty cool. I'm sure we're missing a bunch of stuff, but whatever.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Tired Legs, Crazy Schedule
Man. What a weekend.
This morning, I got up to a house that was empty. J had to work, the kiddos spent the night out, and the only thing on my agenda was a 7 mile run and A's t-ball practice at 1. I managed to finally drag my butt out of the house around 9 and hit the trail around the lake.
The first mile was HARD. At first, I wondered if maybe I still wasn't recovered from the LR Half, and that may be a little valid. But then I thought about how busy yesterday was, and realized that my legs should absolutely be tired. This was yesterday's schedule:
7:30: wake up.
8:00: go to bagel store.
9:30: finish making pizza dough, prep toppings;
10:45: round up kiddos and go watch J play a singles match.
12:15: eat lunch out with family.
1:15: haul ass back to house, throw on tennis clothes, grab rackets and water, prep for tennis match.
1:30: hit the road for tennis match.
2:00: warmup for tennis match.
3:00: tennis match.
5:00: arrive back at house, get cleaned up, finish pizza toppings prep, preheat oven, start putting together pizzas; put together 6 pizzas over next few hours, sit down maybe once.
9:00: everyone leaves. Collapse. Play guitar for a few minutes. Try to play word with friends.
10:00: give up trying to keep eyes open. Go to bed.
I think I sat down about four times yesterday: at the bagel store, at lunch, in the car, and a few times at dinner. Other than that, I was on my feet all day. NO FREAKNG WONDER my legs were tired, right?
The 7 miler this morning went fine once I shook out the creaks and fatigue from yesterday, though. It was a beautiful day, the breeze was nice and cool, the sun was warm, and the music was perfect. Sometimes the shuffle seems to know just what I need to keep me going. Is it sad that I'mlooking forward to spending time on an airplane, just because I won't be able to get up?
This morning, I got up to a house that was empty. J had to work, the kiddos spent the night out, and the only thing on my agenda was a 7 mile run and A's t-ball practice at 1. I managed to finally drag my butt out of the house around 9 and hit the trail around the lake.
The first mile was HARD. At first, I wondered if maybe I still wasn't recovered from the LR Half, and that may be a little valid. But then I thought about how busy yesterday was, and realized that my legs should absolutely be tired. This was yesterday's schedule:
7:30: wake up.
8:00: go to bagel store.
9:30: finish making pizza dough, prep toppings;
10:45: round up kiddos and go watch J play a singles match.
12:15: eat lunch out with family.
1:15: haul ass back to house, throw on tennis clothes, grab rackets and water, prep for tennis match.
1:30: hit the road for tennis match.
2:00: warmup for tennis match.
3:00: tennis match.
5:00: arrive back at house, get cleaned up, finish pizza toppings prep, preheat oven, start putting together pizzas; put together 6 pizzas over next few hours, sit down maybe once.
9:00: everyone leaves. Collapse. Play guitar for a few minutes. Try to play word with friends.
10:00: give up trying to keep eyes open. Go to bed.
I think I sat down about four times yesterday: at the bagel store, at lunch, in the car, and a few times at dinner. Other than that, I was on my feet all day. NO FREAKNG WONDER my legs were tired, right?
The 7 miler this morning went fine once I shook out the creaks and fatigue from yesterday, though. It was a beautiful day, the breeze was nice and cool, the sun was warm, and the music was perfect. Sometimes the shuffle seems to know just what I need to keep me going. Is it sad that I'mlooking forward to spending time on an airplane, just because I won't be able to get up?
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Checklists
Of the big three to-dos on my list yesterday, only one remains. Unfortunately, it is the least enjoyable of the three. Tennis match? Check. Won by a decent margin with legs that didn't feel like jello. Pizza making? Check. Made 6 pizzas of varying types tonight and had folks over to help eat. The crusts turned out yummy and the pizza was a hit. Bonus? There are leftovers.
What remains? Packing. We've got a spring break trip coming up, so tomorrow will be dedicated to finishing laundry and packing. And the girl's t-ball practice. And a 7 mile run. Huh. Sometimes I'm amazed at what all can get done in a day.
Somehow, we managed to end up sans kiddos tonight...I'm still not sure how that happened, but I'm beginning to see the advantages to sleepovers. And on that note, off to bed. Gonna be a hectic couple of days...
What remains? Packing. We've got a spring break trip coming up, so tomorrow will be dedicated to finishing laundry and packing. And the girl's t-ball practice. And a 7 mile run. Huh. Sometimes I'm amazed at what all can get done in a day.
Somehow, we managed to end up sans kiddos tonight...I'm still not sure how that happened, but I'm beginning to see the advantages to sleepovers. And on that note, off to bed. Gonna be a hectic couple of days...
Friday, March 18, 2011
Spring Fever
Ahhh, it's Friday and almost spring break. I think I have every window in the house open today, the weather is simply amazing. It's really all I can do to keep from playing hooky today...
So let's see, quick 3 mile run last night. Actually, it started fast but I ended up with a random shin splint somewhere along the way, and finished slower than I really wanted. The legs still aren't 100%, but they are definitely better than they were on Sunday. Now if they can get me through my singles match tomorrow, all will be good.
The weekend is going to be busy - tennis matches, pizza making, and packing are the three big things on the agenda. Guess I should start making my to do list. Really, though, all I want to do is get a book and head to the hammock on the back deck. Being responsible sucks sometimes.
So let's see, quick 3 mile run last night. Actually, it started fast but I ended up with a random shin splint somewhere along the way, and finished slower than I really wanted. The legs still aren't 100%, but they are definitely better than they were on Sunday. Now if they can get me through my singles match tomorrow, all will be good.
The weekend is going to be busy - tennis matches, pizza making, and packing are the three big things on the agenda. Guess I should start making my to do list. Really, though, all I want to do is get a book and head to the hammock on the back deck. Being responsible sucks sometimes.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
In Which I Sound like a Four Year Old
Alternate Title: Follow the Rules, Part 1.
I've been reminding myself lately of a four year old. No, not because I've been throwing a bunch of tantrums (although apologies to J for the occasional ones I do throw). But I feel like I've been asking "why" more than usual lately.
Starting with a book club discussion about Chua's Tiger Mom book, and threading through discussions with a coworker this week, I feel like I've questioned a lot of assumptions.
The main context has been education and the expectations we put on our children. Chua, in case you aren't familiar with her book, heaps huge expectations on her children to be "the best" at whatever activity they are pursuing - be it grades, music, public speaking, or anything else. She strictly follows the rules for "Chinese parenting" and constantly pushes her girls to excel. She spends hours daily with her girls, pushing them, prodding them, forcing them to achieve greater and greater success.
In the same context, a coworker of mine worked very hard in applying for a highly competitive spot for her soon-to-be kindergartner in a nationally ranked elementary school. 100% of its graduates go on to college, quite often to Ivy League schools. She found out last week that her son got in, and she's very excited and very happy about it.
Neither of these are routes that J and I have followed. I couldn't Chinese parent if I tried - I'm far too lazy for that. And neither of us are big fans of private schools. I spent elementary school in private school, but went to public from 7th grade on, and J did public his whole life. I'm pretty sure we turned out ok...
But for some reason, these two things have made me question my choices for my kids. And that's not necessarily a bad thing; sometimes decisions need revisiting. When we started Benjamin at his school, it was with an understanding that this is kindergarten, not college. If it doesn't work for him, we can change schools.
But every time I start to question the decisions I'm making, wonder if I shouldn't be pushing harder, expecting more, placing more emphasis on school work and how he's doing, I come back to one particular word - Why.
Why is it assumed that chasing the grades in school, at the best possible school, is a good thing? Because, after all, regardless of which school you go to, the private elementary, the neighborhood public school, whatever - the grades and test scores are the measure of success.
Well, of course it's a good thing, right? I mean, that's how you get into a good college, and that's how you get the job you want, and that's how you set yourself up for a good life.
But is that really the best way? My kiddos can chase grades all they want, but if they are chasing grades just for the sake of getting good grades ... eventually that's going to end. And there's so much emphasis on grades and testing, to the detriment of actually enjoying what you are studying. I guess I'm just trying to figure out how much emphasis I want to put on getting good grades, and why it is such a default.
Yes, good grades open all sorts of doors. But opening doors just to be opening doors will be a hollow victory for them in the end, because real life has a far different grading scale than A through F.
I'm just not sure what direction to go with this. I suppose it's one of those "decisions in progress" where you just reevaluate often and hope you are making the right decisions. Part of the fun of parenting, right?
I've been reminding myself lately of a four year old. No, not because I've been throwing a bunch of tantrums (although apologies to J for the occasional ones I do throw). But I feel like I've been asking "why" more than usual lately.
Starting with a book club discussion about Chua's Tiger Mom book, and threading through discussions with a coworker this week, I feel like I've questioned a lot of assumptions.
The main context has been education and the expectations we put on our children. Chua, in case you aren't familiar with her book, heaps huge expectations on her children to be "the best" at whatever activity they are pursuing - be it grades, music, public speaking, or anything else. She strictly follows the rules for "Chinese parenting" and constantly pushes her girls to excel. She spends hours daily with her girls, pushing them, prodding them, forcing them to achieve greater and greater success.
In the same context, a coworker of mine worked very hard in applying for a highly competitive spot for her soon-to-be kindergartner in a nationally ranked elementary school. 100% of its graduates go on to college, quite often to Ivy League schools. She found out last week that her son got in, and she's very excited and very happy about it.
Neither of these are routes that J and I have followed. I couldn't Chinese parent if I tried - I'm far too lazy for that. And neither of us are big fans of private schools. I spent elementary school in private school, but went to public from 7th grade on, and J did public his whole life. I'm pretty sure we turned out ok...
But for some reason, these two things have made me question my choices for my kids. And that's not necessarily a bad thing; sometimes decisions need revisiting. When we started Benjamin at his school, it was with an understanding that this is kindergarten, not college. If it doesn't work for him, we can change schools.
But every time I start to question the decisions I'm making, wonder if I shouldn't be pushing harder, expecting more, placing more emphasis on school work and how he's doing, I come back to one particular word - Why.
Why is it assumed that chasing the grades in school, at the best possible school, is a good thing? Because, after all, regardless of which school you go to, the private elementary, the neighborhood public school, whatever - the grades and test scores are the measure of success.
Well, of course it's a good thing, right? I mean, that's how you get into a good college, and that's how you get the job you want, and that's how you set yourself up for a good life.
But is that really the best way? My kiddos can chase grades all they want, but if they are chasing grades just for the sake of getting good grades ... eventually that's going to end. And there's so much emphasis on grades and testing, to the detriment of actually enjoying what you are studying. I guess I'm just trying to figure out how much emphasis I want to put on getting good grades, and why it is such a default.
Yes, good grades open all sorts of doors. But opening doors just to be opening doors will be a hollow victory for them in the end, because real life has a far different grading scale than A through F.
I'm just not sure what direction to go with this. I suppose it's one of those "decisions in progress" where you just reevaluate often and hope you are making the right decisions. Part of the fun of parenting, right?
Monday, March 14, 2011
Random Bullets
Well, let's see. Time for some bullets.
- Drove down to Houston last night, spending a few days here for work this week.
- I intentionally left my running shoes in Arkansas so I wouldn't be tempted to run while I'm here. The weather is so nice, it's probably a good thing I did. My legs actually are not at all sore, but the various other body parts that are (ass, abs, etc.) will appreciate the break. I always say tennis is a full body workout...
- Apparently Alyssa did not get out of bed this morning because it was still dark outside when her alarm went off. She though J had set her alarm wrong, so she went back to sleep. Gotta love daylight savings crap. And really, getting up before the sun is up is not so much fun.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Craziness
So, the last few days have been a bit crazy. In the past 3 days, I've played four tennis matches, with a 50/50 record. One of the matches I was ok with losing; she's better than I am, and has played at a higher level than I have for the last several years. The second match I lost, though, is irritating because I lost to someone I could have beaten. Granted, that would probably be on a day where I'm fully rested and don't feel like my legs are going to fall off, but still...
But, regardless of my wins and/or losses, my team won our tournament. What this means is that we have an automatic entry into the state tournament at the end of the season. If we win that tournament, we move on to a higher level of competition, which we were fortunate enough to do last season. It would be nice to repeat this year, but for the moment? I'm just happy to not be playing.
So I'm gonna take a few days off from exercising this week. I've earned it. In retrospect, running a half marathon the weekend before I played four tennis matches in a row might not have been the best idea...oh well. Live and learn. And remember that I'm not 18 anymore. Sigh.
On the kiddo front, this little gem happened last night. We were in the car coming back from dinner, and Jimmy Buffet's Margaritaville was playing on XM. The song was at the point where he sings "I blew out my flip flop, stepped on a pop top..."
From the backseat, Benjamin pipes up: "Pop tarts? I love pop tarts!!"
My stomach hurt from laughing so hard. It was a good way to end the night.
But, regardless of my wins and/or losses, my team won our tournament. What this means is that we have an automatic entry into the state tournament at the end of the season. If we win that tournament, we move on to a higher level of competition, which we were fortunate enough to do last season. It would be nice to repeat this year, but for the moment? I'm just happy to not be playing.
So I'm gonna take a few days off from exercising this week. I've earned it. In retrospect, running a half marathon the weekend before I played four tennis matches in a row might not have been the best idea...oh well. Live and learn. And remember that I'm not 18 anymore. Sigh.
On the kiddo front, this little gem happened last night. We were in the car coming back from dinner, and Jimmy Buffet's Margaritaville was playing on XM. The song was at the point where he sings "I blew out my flip flop, stepped on a pop top..."
From the backseat, Benjamin pipes up: "Pop tarts? I love pop tarts!!"
My stomach hurt from laughing so hard. It was a good way to end the night.
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