OK, yes. I'm wearing a suit today. It's been nearly a year since I've put any of my suits on, and when I tried them on yesterday, they were all loose. Guess I should thank the running for that one.
Reason for a suit? I have an interview later today with a law firm in town. I have no idea if they have a need for my skill set, or if it will be a good fit, but it's worth a shot.
When I went into law school, I swore I wasn't going to do litigation. When I graduated law school, I swore I would never do litigation. When I started my first job - not in litigation - I swore I didn't have the personality for litigation and didn't know how the litigators did it.
Fast forward 10 years, 8 years of which I practiced litigation, and I've pretty much learned to never say never. The interview today is with the head of litigation. It's a good firm, good people, and they appear to do interesting work. There are far worse things in life than that. Send good vibes.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Monday, November 28, 2011
Conroy
I've been reading Pat Conroy's autobiographical My Reading Life over the last few weeks. Conroy wrote The Great Santini, Lords of Discipline, and Prince of Tides, all of which I've read and enjoyed. This one, however, is probably my favorite because of the insight it gives into his writing. He also waxes poetic about words and phrases and books and authors - things that I adore.
I've had about four separate times in the book (and it's a fairly short one) where I've paused, put the book down for a few moments, and reflected on what he's said.
"I reach for a story to save my own life."
This one is my favorite, followed closely by this one:
"Hurt is a great teacher. Maybe the greatest of all."
These statement, separated by about 2 pages in the book, ring incredibly true to me. During some of the more painful times in my life, books have helped me make sense of events and situations, and have helped me keep my sanity (what little there was of it, anyway).
I've not been reading as much lately for one reason or another. I forget how nourishing a good read can be. Too bad there are only 24 hours in a day...
I've had about four separate times in the book (and it's a fairly short one) where I've paused, put the book down for a few moments, and reflected on what he's said.
"I reach for a story to save my own life."
This one is my favorite, followed closely by this one:
"Hurt is a great teacher. Maybe the greatest of all."
These statement, separated by about 2 pages in the book, ring incredibly true to me. During some of the more painful times in my life, books have helped me make sense of events and situations, and have helped me keep my sanity (what little there was of it, anyway).
I've not been reading as much lately for one reason or another. I forget how nourishing a good read can be. Too bad there are only 24 hours in a day...
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Ahhhhh.
What a great couple of days. There was (of course) lots of food and lots of connecting with friends and family. The kiddos played with their cousins for two or three straight days, and I'm pretty sure I had too much fun for it to be legal. Ah well. What's a holiday for, after all.
Saturday, I made a last minute decision to run my12 miler that morning instead of waiting until Sunday afternoon. I hit the river trail about 10:15am, and the rain started around 11:30. Unfortunately, I was still two miles from my car when it starting coming down in earnest. Fortunately, we all know I'm not made of sugar, so I managed to finish the run without melting. It was actually kind of peaceful - a slow, gentle rain in 60 degree weather. I got 7 miles in before I called it quits. Hm. 7 miles does not equal the 12 I was supposed to do.
So Sunday afternoon, I finished the 5 miles that the rain aborted. When I reviewed my running log, I discovered that, barring injury or sickness in the next few days, I will have more than 60 miles for this month. I've not logged that many monthly miles since January of 2010, and that makes me a little paranoid - that was the month I managed to screw up my knee. That was the wonderful injury that derailed serious exercise in general for about 6 months; not a fun time.
The Fayetteville half marathon is in just under two weeks. At this point, I'm not 100% ready, but I'm pretty sure I can knock out that run without killing myself. And as a bonus, there are lots of friends running that one with me, so it's going to be a blast, sore quads and all.
Saturday, I made a last minute decision to run my12 miler that morning instead of waiting until Sunday afternoon. I hit the river trail about 10:15am, and the rain started around 11:30. Unfortunately, I was still two miles from my car when it starting coming down in earnest. Fortunately, we all know I'm not made of sugar, so I managed to finish the run without melting. It was actually kind of peaceful - a slow, gentle rain in 60 degree weather. I got 7 miles in before I called it quits. Hm. 7 miles does not equal the 12 I was supposed to do.
So Sunday afternoon, I finished the 5 miles that the rain aborted. When I reviewed my running log, I discovered that, barring injury or sickness in the next few days, I will have more than 60 miles for this month. I've not logged that many monthly miles since January of 2010, and that makes me a little paranoid - that was the month I managed to screw up my knee. That was the wonderful injury that derailed serious exercise in general for about 6 months; not a fun time.
The Fayetteville half marathon is in just under two weeks. At this point, I'm not 100% ready, but I'm pretty sure I can knock out that run without killing myself. And as a bonus, there are lots of friends running that one with me, so it's going to be a blast, sore quads and all.
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Reincarnation
It feels a wee bit cliche around Thanksgiving to talk about the things for which I am most grateful - even though this is when you are supposed to do it, after all. But I'm not usually fan of doing things the normal or easy way. Something contrary in my personality maybe. So really, saying how incredibly thankful I feel this time of the year feels a bit awkward and doesn't come naturally. (I kind of suck at that sort of stuff in person.)
That aside, though - I am incredibly thankful for the people in my life. I try to pay attention on a daily basis to the things with which I'm blessed. And some days I do better than others. But this year, I feel exceedingly fortunate. Sometimes I wonder what kind of miracles I worked in a prior life to wind up here. Happy, healthy, and very, very grateful for friends and family who give meaning to my life.
That aside, though - I am incredibly thankful for the people in my life. I try to pay attention on a daily basis to the things with which I'm blessed. And some days I do better than others. But this year, I feel exceedingly fortunate. Sometimes I wonder what kind of miracles I worked in a prior life to wind up here. Happy, healthy, and very, very grateful for friends and family who give meaning to my life.
Monday, November 21, 2011
About the Running, Among other Things...
Yeesh. I'm not sure how I can really say that the last few weeks have been all that busy...but they have! But we all know that's an excuse. I just haven't been running. We've got the Fayetteville half marathon coming up in just under 3 weeks, and I really need to get my ass in gear. The best long run I've gotten didn't make it to 11 miles, and my weekly three and four milers have been sorely lacking. So today, I get back to it. It'll probably be a treadmill kinda day, but that's ok. I just need to take get some miles under my belt and get back on track.
Oh, and on a different note, I sent some resumes around last week. I finally hit the point where I felt like it was the right time to start looking. I've gotten some positive feedback, but I'm not sure things will play out. I do kind of miss having some structure to my day, but I'm not looking forward to the craziness that comes with two working parents. Oh well, no reason to bellyache about it - it'll all work out eventually.
Oh, and on a different note, I sent some resumes around last week. I finally hit the point where I felt like it was the right time to start looking. I've gotten some positive feedback, but I'm not sure things will play out. I do kind of miss having some structure to my day, but I'm not looking forward to the craziness that comes with two working parents. Oh well, no reason to bellyache about it - it'll all work out eventually.
Mount Magazine
Although I lived in Arkansas for my entire childhood, I somehow never made it up to Mount Magazine - the highest point in Arkansas. This weekend, J and I joined some friends at a cabin up there, and it was beautiful. Although we were fogged in on Saturday (visibility was about 20 feet at some points), we did get out to do a 3 hour 4-wheeler tour that afternoon, which was a ton of fun. I've never really ridden a 4-wheeler before, so I was a bit nervous at first. But after about half an hour, I started to get the feel for it, and really enjoyed myself. We went up and down back trails in the mountains, while I tried not to drive into a tree as I took in the sights. The trees were definitely past peak foliage, but still quite beautiful. It was a good reminder of how beautiful some parts of this state are.
We stayed at one of the cabins up on the mountain, near the Mount Magazine lodge; the back deck looked out over this incredible vista (which we didn't really see until Sunday morning, but whatev. It was there.). We took full advantage of the hot tub out there both nights, even though the first night it was about 40 degrees and windy as hell. We also hiked to the top of Signal Hill, which is the highest point in Arkansas. It was interesting to be at a point where there was no more 'up' - you were at the top.
We ate well, drank well, played Settlers of Catan for the first time (I think J is hooked, which will not be a surprise to anyone who knows him), and generally had a very good time. I'm pretty sure we'll want to take the kiddos next time we go - I think they'd dig some of the hiking trails, and the scenery was pretty incredible in places. I'm sure I'll be setting myself up for some whining, but whatever. That's my role, right? That's what a parent does.
We stayed at one of the cabins up on the mountain, near the Mount Magazine lodge; the back deck looked out over this incredible vista (which we didn't really see until Sunday morning, but whatev. It was there.). We took full advantage of the hot tub out there both nights, even though the first night it was about 40 degrees and windy as hell. We also hiked to the top of Signal Hill, which is the highest point in Arkansas. It was interesting to be at a point where there was no more 'up' - you were at the top.
We ate well, drank well, played Settlers of Catan for the first time (I think J is hooked, which will not be a surprise to anyone who knows him), and generally had a very good time. I'm pretty sure we'll want to take the kiddos next time we go - I think they'd dig some of the hiking trails, and the scenery was pretty incredible in places. I'm sure I'll be setting myself up for some whining, but whatever. That's my role, right? That's what a parent does.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Peace
Some of my posts a while back touched on finding peace and happiness in life - you know, those intangibles that I suppose we all search for, one way or another. It was a bit startling for me to realize, several years ago, that happiness isn't really a 'linear' type thing (A+B does not necessarily = C), nor is it a predetermined goal that someone else can set for you. In fact, the happiness and peace that is spoken of by one person often means not a damn thing to anyone else - each person has to decide for him or herself what creates those elements in his or her life. Yes, this seems like common sense, and maybe it is to some people. But I tend to be slow on the uptake of some things, and this one took me a while to internalize.
I've had several discussions with friends lately about how to get there, how to find these things in life. About how to figure out what makes you feel fulfilled, what makes your life satisfactory to you. Apparently I'm not the only one who thinks of this stuff - that's good to know. Hehe.
But it has been a very interesting, intense several weeks. After a lot of deep conversations and thoughts, I'm finding a sense of peace about my life and where I am. There are some things that need some tackling, and that will happen. But overall...I have nothing to complain about. I'm feeling more comfortable in my skin than I have in years, and it's a good feeling. And even better, more comfortable about my path forward. And really, if I have that - I have not a damn thing to complain about.
But I'm sure I still will. ;-)
I've had several discussions with friends lately about how to get there, how to find these things in life. About how to figure out what makes you feel fulfilled, what makes your life satisfactory to you. Apparently I'm not the only one who thinks of this stuff - that's good to know. Hehe.
But it has been a very interesting, intense several weeks. After a lot of deep conversations and thoughts, I'm finding a sense of peace about my life and where I am. There are some things that need some tackling, and that will happen. But overall...I have nothing to complain about. I'm feeling more comfortable in my skin than I have in years, and it's a good feeling. And even better, more comfortable about my path forward. And really, if I have that - I have not a damn thing to complain about.
But I'm sure I still will. ;-)
Wow.
It has been a LONG time since I've been this sore. More specifically, since my legs have been this sore. My quads are killing me tonight. My regular doubles game tonight was an exercise in how to move as little as possible and still lose a match.
I guess I ran a lot harder than I thought on Monday, I just didn't realize it. I've been running without my heart rate strap lately, which is usually a pretty good gauge of how much effort I'm putting into a run. I thought I didn't really 'need' a heart rate monitor to tell me how much effort I was putting into a run, but now I'm thinking I might be wrong. Well, my legs are telling me I'm wrong anyway.
So next long run, I guess I'll go back to the heart rate strap and try to keep my heart rate down while I run. Dammit. Maybe by the time I do my next long run, it won't be 80 friggin' degrees. Grrrr.
I guess I ran a lot harder than I thought on Monday, I just didn't realize it. I've been running without my heart rate strap lately, which is usually a pretty good gauge of how much effort I'm putting into a run. I thought I didn't really 'need' a heart rate monitor to tell me how much effort I was putting into a run, but now I'm thinking I might be wrong. Well, my legs are telling me I'm wrong anyway.
So next long run, I guess I'll go back to the heart rate strap and try to keep my heart rate down while I run. Dammit. Maybe by the time I do my next long run, it won't be 80 friggin' degrees. Grrrr.
Don't Be Stupid
I didn't get a chance to do my long run this weekend, so I ended up doing it yesterday morning / early afternoon. The goal was 12 miles, even though I had only done 1 of the 3 midweek runs that I was supposed to do last week. I'm not sure whether it was my slackerness on that front, or the 20mph wind gusts, or the 80 degree weather, or whether I just wasn't hydrated / fortified correctly, but I only managed 10.75. I don't tend to cut runs short very often, but when I paused to get a drink before finishing the last 1.25 miles, I just didn't feel right.
I can be as hard core as anyone, but when it comes to pushing my body what I think is too far? I just don't do it. I've never been a fan of working out so hard that you puke, or pushing yourself to injury or to the very brink of passing out or whatever. I think you can achieve great results without being stupid. And I felt "off" enough yesterday that it made me think that finishing the last bit of distance, without anyone running with me, would be stupid. I'm irritated, yes, and sore as hell today, but oh well. Perhaps I'll now be motivated to get the weekly runs in, instead of just counting on long distance for the weekend. We'll see, right?
On a different front, the kindergarten teachers at the kiddos' schools had a parent meeting last night to talk about testing and test scores and all manner of goodness. I saw the emphasis test scores got last year towards the end of the year, when they focused on the skills they need for testing, and it irritated me. I'm a little easier with it this year, because I haven't seen as much of that yet. And I feel better after the meeting last night, because they are asking for help from home to work on some of those skills, so they can continue to teach other stuff in the classroom. I'm good with that. We were given some tools and suggestions on what to work on, many of which I know the girl is going to really enjoy.
It still makes me sad, though, how much emphasis this stuff gets. Good teachers should never have to fear for their jobs because of a decision a 5 year old makes. But that's what can happen, and it is very frustrating. Not to mention the fact that the main focus is on growth. I'm not knocking that idea - in fact, I think it's wonderful to show improvement over the year. At the same time, I know my kiddos don't always improve in a linear fashion. B's reading went in fits and starts last year, but took a huge jump over the summer. What do you do with kids like that? The ones who are absolutely smart enough, who are getting the correct teaching, and just haven't quite made the leap yet? Because if you have kids, you know how that happens. They may improve a small amount over a few months, and then make a huge leap. And my takeaway from last night is if that small improvement happens over a testing period, regardless of what happens next, the teacher is screwed. The testing mentality, as it stands, sucks.
Stepping down from the soapbox now, I promise. Although I kind of liked being up high for a few minutes...maybe I'll do that more often.
I can be as hard core as anyone, but when it comes to pushing my body what I think is too far? I just don't do it. I've never been a fan of working out so hard that you puke, or pushing yourself to injury or to the very brink of passing out or whatever. I think you can achieve great results without being stupid. And I felt "off" enough yesterday that it made me think that finishing the last bit of distance, without anyone running with me, would be stupid. I'm irritated, yes, and sore as hell today, but oh well. Perhaps I'll now be motivated to get the weekly runs in, instead of just counting on long distance for the weekend. We'll see, right?
On a different front, the kindergarten teachers at the kiddos' schools had a parent meeting last night to talk about testing and test scores and all manner of goodness. I saw the emphasis test scores got last year towards the end of the year, when they focused on the skills they need for testing, and it irritated me. I'm a little easier with it this year, because I haven't seen as much of that yet. And I feel better after the meeting last night, because they are asking for help from home to work on some of those skills, so they can continue to teach other stuff in the classroom. I'm good with that. We were given some tools and suggestions on what to work on, many of which I know the girl is going to really enjoy.
It still makes me sad, though, how much emphasis this stuff gets. Good teachers should never have to fear for their jobs because of a decision a 5 year old makes. But that's what can happen, and it is very frustrating. Not to mention the fact that the main focus is on growth. I'm not knocking that idea - in fact, I think it's wonderful to show improvement over the year. At the same time, I know my kiddos don't always improve in a linear fashion. B's reading went in fits and starts last year, but took a huge jump over the summer. What do you do with kids like that? The ones who are absolutely smart enough, who are getting the correct teaching, and just haven't quite made the leap yet? Because if you have kids, you know how that happens. They may improve a small amount over a few months, and then make a huge leap. And my takeaway from last night is if that small improvement happens over a testing period, regardless of what happens next, the teacher is screwed. The testing mentality, as it stands, sucks.
Stepping down from the soapbox now, I promise. Although I kind of liked being up high for a few minutes...maybe I'll do that more often.
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Sunday Settling
I've spent the last two or three days out of town, visiting a good friend of mine. It was a fantastic trip, but of course involved driving and wayyyy too little sleep. Neither of which is a huge deal, but takes me a few days to recover. Another fun reminder that I am getting farther and farther from 18. Ugh. But the trip also involved Macallan 18 and some killer, knock your socks off sushi, among other things. I definitely came out ahead on this one. I got in around 7:30 last night and cratered around 10:00. I was DONE.
But so happy I went.
So today, I've got a 12 miler on tap, along with all the stuff involved in getting ready for the week. I'm sure there's a grocery run and other assorted things that have popped up while I've been gone. But that's ok. As much as I enjoyed the trip, I'm definitely happy to be home.
But so happy I went.
So today, I've got a 12 miler on tap, along with all the stuff involved in getting ready for the week. I'm sure there's a grocery run and other assorted things that have popped up while I've been gone. But that's ok. As much as I enjoyed the trip, I'm definitely happy to be home.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Moan, Groan, Complain, Gripe
I have a cold. It's not horrible, but it's annoying. It's wearing me down.
I managed a 3 mile run yesterday morning and played doubles last night. I didn't really enjoy either workout, and that's not like me. In fact, I couldn't wait to get off the court last night. I was asleep by 10:30.
Today, my hip hurts like hell and is suggesting that I take the day off from any physical activity.
I think the universe is trying to tell me something.
I managed a 3 mile run yesterday morning and played doubles last night. I didn't really enjoy either workout, and that's not like me. In fact, I couldn't wait to get off the court last night. I was asleep by 10:30.
Today, my hip hurts like hell and is suggesting that I take the day off from any physical activity.
I think the universe is trying to tell me something.
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Morning Running
There's a reason I don't like running in the morning. I suck at it. I went for a 3 mile run after dropping off the kiddos this morning, and it pretty much sucked the entire way. I listened to my favorite running podcast (heavy on the philosophy and dualism and Des Cartes today), which should have made it fly by. Instead, my legs complained, my breathing was not easy, and it just felt like a harder run than it should have.
Could be due to the cold I have right now, which seems to now include a cough - BONUS! Or it could be the 10 miler that included the hellacious hill this weekend. Or, the most likely reason - I'm just not a morning runner. I'm thinking too many years of tennis practice at 4pm conditioned my body to be active in the afternoon. That morning stuff is for the birds.
On the plus side, it was beautiful today. The leaves are either at peak or just beyond, and the colors were amazing. We should see a pretty good storm front come through this afternoon, so we'll probably lose a lot of the color, but it was beautiful this morning. Another reminder of why I enjoy being back in Arkansas so much. Fall colors rock.
Could be due to the cold I have right now, which seems to now include a cough - BONUS! Or it could be the 10 miler that included the hellacious hill this weekend. Or, the most likely reason - I'm just not a morning runner. I'm thinking too many years of tennis practice at 4pm conditioned my body to be active in the afternoon. That morning stuff is for the birds.
On the plus side, it was beautiful today. The leaves are either at peak or just beyond, and the colors were amazing. We should see a pretty good storm front come through this afternoon, so we'll probably lose a lot of the color, but it was beautiful this morning. Another reminder of why I enjoy being back in Arkansas so much. Fall colors rock.
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Weekend Wrapup
I guess it's more than just the weekend, but here's the last several days, anyway.
- Hash run last Wednesday night (local running group with the slogan 'we are a drinking group with a running problem') - 4 miles, interesting people, good pizza. A good night.
- I can't remember Thursday. Oh wait. I just did. It involved a Fall Festival at the kids' school and a 40 minute temper tantrum from the girl. Now I wish I hadn't remembered Thursday...
- Short run Friday - 3 miles, a good pace, a nice run.
- Friday night - a great time at my friend M's house. I met some very interesting women, and had several excellent conversations. I also ended up staying up way too late, crashing for about an hour on their couch before J was ready to go and drove my tired ass home. I think we finally went to bed around 3:30 Saturday morning.
- Saturday - took me most of the morning to recover from the previous night. Also met with some folks about redoing the shower in our master bathroom - that bathroom project is going to be FUN, lemme tell you. You know you're gonna hear more than you ever want to about it in the coming months...
- Saturday afternoon - last baseball game of the season! Yay! B got on base both times he was at bat, which was awesome to see. He's got some potential, and he's improved dramatically this season. His mom needs to take a serious chill pill, but she's working on that...and we are now done with Wednesday night practices and Saturday games. WHEW.
- Saturday night - watched the Hogs game with some friends and chilled out. Went to bed early.
- Today - after NINE hours of sleep, J and I got up, made breakfast, and plotted our day, including 10 mile runs for both of us.
- Today's run was pretty decent. I ran a lot of it with my friend M, so I didn't have much time for introspection, but that's probably for the best. She and I did 8 miles on the Little Rock side of the river, including one serious kick-ass hill. It was nearly a solid mile going straight uphill. I think I trashed my quads for the next week on that sucker. But she has a point - if we're gonna run a half mary in Fayetteville, dammit, we have to run some hills. I just wasn't thinking a 1 mile steep straight up hill, but whatever. We did it. We're cool like that.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Ahem. Hello? Anyone Still Here?
I've said before that when I have certain kinds of things going on in my life, it makes it hard to write. Let's just say I've had a LOT of stuff going on. I think I can safely say that October 2011 was one of the most interesting months of my life. Not bad, not good, just interesting. And I can take that. That's a hell of a lot better than "bad," right?
I've got some good friends going through some really difficult times right now. I can identify with them, and some of it reminds me of the rough time I had several years ago. It was a time I would never wish on anyone else, yet left me with so much gained that I'd never wish it hadn't occurred. Yeah, that made no sense. But anyway. I don't envy what they are going through. At. All.
It's also had me thinking a lot about my life, too. I have some rather unconventional beliefs about a lot of things in life, and I've seen some of those played out recently. For the most part, it has reconfirmed that the road less traveled works well for me in a lot of areas. But the problem with the road less traveled is that none of the road maps are very good. CW has lots to say about what is conventional - what you do in normal situations. But get off the normal path, and, well, you're really on your own.
So yeah. Lots of thinking and talking going on here. J has called me a "text therapist" more than once lately, and I'm feeling a bit like that. The problem is that it's difficult to step back from the drama sometimes, even if it's not really my drama. But all good. Let's see if I can't jumpstart the writing and get back to it this week. Fingers crossed.
I've got some good friends going through some really difficult times right now. I can identify with them, and some of it reminds me of the rough time I had several years ago. It was a time I would never wish on anyone else, yet left me with so much gained that I'd never wish it hadn't occurred. Yeah, that made no sense. But anyway. I don't envy what they are going through. At. All.
It's also had me thinking a lot about my life, too. I have some rather unconventional beliefs about a lot of things in life, and I've seen some of those played out recently. For the most part, it has reconfirmed that the road less traveled works well for me in a lot of areas. But the problem with the road less traveled is that none of the road maps are very good. CW has lots to say about what is conventional - what you do in normal situations. But get off the normal path, and, well, you're really on your own.
So yeah. Lots of thinking and talking going on here. J has called me a "text therapist" more than once lately, and I'm feeling a bit like that. The problem is that it's difficult to step back from the drama sometimes, even if it's not really my drama. But all good. Let's see if I can't jumpstart the writing and get back to it this week. Fingers crossed.
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