Judgmental

I dropped the kiddos off at school yesterday, and then made a quick trip up to NWA to have lunch with a friend who was up in that area for a visit with family. She's become a very good friend over the last few years, and I feel pretty damn lucky to have gotten to know her.

We went to lunch today, and she brought her mom along so I could meet her. The three of us had a great time chatting for a few hours and eating gourmet grilled cheese sandwiches (I know, sounds strange - try Hammontree's in Fayetteville). At one point in the conversation, my friend referred to me as being nonjudgmental.

In the past, my response would've been along the lines of some self-deprecating "I try really hard at that" or "I do my best" or some other such bullshit. Not that that's not true; I actually do try pretty hard to not be judgmental. But as I've been mulling over the events of last week, I've really started to question whether that's as true as it could be. So instead of the normal response, my response yesterday was along the lines of "no, I'm pretty damn judgmental sometimes."

There are some areas where I have no problems with it. People's beliefs in religion, sexuality, and other social issues are easy areas. I think people should do what makes them happy, believe what they believe - as long as they aren't hurting anyone else or imposing their beliefs on other people. Pretty straightforward stuff.

But I recently called someone judgmental on a particular topic while I was venting to a friend. What I said stayed with me, and has been nagging at me. I started wondering whether you can have strong opinions on topics and not be judgmental. Or whether you can even claim you are trying to be nonjudgmental if you call someone out for being just that.

I'm also now wondering where I might be being judgmental and am just not realizing it. Because without a doubt, I am; I'm not sure it's possible to live and not be that way sometimes. But if you don't look for it, you sure as hell won't find it.