Christmas Card Crankiness

I think we received our first Christmas card this year (or holiday card, whatever) the weekend of Thanksgiving.  I don't really have a problem with getting them early - if you are going to send them out, bully for you for being on top of things!  I always enjoy reading through them, checking in to see what folks have been up to for the past year, and seeing how much everyone's kids have grown.  I usually enjoy the occasional newsletters, too - it's interesting to see someone's life over the past year encapsulated in a page.  You get a sense about what is really important to them.  But I do feel bad this time of the year when someone asks for my address, because I gave up sending out Christmas cards about 10 years ago.  So what are you supposed say to someone when you send them your address - hey, here's my address, but be forewarned that I'm not asking for yours because I don't "do" Christmas cards?  Yeah, that goes over well, but I've been known to say that on occasion...

When I decided not to send out Christmas cards several years ago, I just simply couldn't bring myself to make the effort.  It sounds terrible, but J and I were not too far out of college, still had many sets of friends who were changing addresses each year, and gathering up the addresses felt like a Herculean task.  Plus, we kept up with people in other ways - a card in December wasn't going to make us any more or less likely to keep up with our friends.  And I couldn't keep up with an address book to save my life.  It was a doomed effort from the beginning, I suppose.

See, this was how the whole card fiasco would go for me, starting about the 2nd week in December:  First, I had to find the address book.  Assuming I could find it (box at the top of the closet?  shoved under the bed?  under the front seat of the car?), then the addresses had to be updated.  So I'd make the several random phone calls that have to be made to get current addresses.  Then the trek(s) to pick out "just the right card."  You know, the one that won't offend anyone but is still humorous /meaningful/ beautiful/ whatever you are going for (although my sense of humor might be a bit more warped than some - sorry if you were a victim of one of "those" cards; hopefully it's been so long you don't remember it).  Once I bought the by-then-well-picked-over-cards, I found it impossible to send them out without a personal note on each one.  This meant that it took a good bit of time to finish each card, because in case you haven't noticed, I like to write.  Sometimes a lot.  And that took time.  And then I had to figure out where I left the batch I wrote during lunch at work one day, and dig out the ones that got crushed in the bottom of my purse.  And then address them.  And stamp them.  And take them all to the post office.  Whew.  I think I need a drink, I'm stressed just thinking about it. 

But the logistics weren't the only thing.  I noticed a few years after J and I got married that I was the only one really concerned with the damn things.  Somehow, that task had fallen in my lap and I ended up being the one responsible for them for both of us; I don't think it mattered to him in the least.  I started resenting the work I was doing to send out these cards, just because it's something you are "supposed to do" at Christmas time.  Doubtless I put the onus on myself, and it irritated me that I automatically assumed that I would be the one in charge of the blasted things.  I guess I could have just scaled back, sent out cards only to a few select friends, but by the time it occurred to me that I wouldn't be executed for not sending out cards,  I was so irritated with the whole process that I scrapped it completely.  So most of my friends have figured out not to expect Christmas cards from me.  I just don't do it.  Or haven't recently, anyway. 

This year, I'm actually contemplating sending them out again.  I'm not sure why - maybe because we are back "home" in Little Rock, maybe because the kiddos are old enough that I don't feel as overwhelmed as I used to, or maybe I just need to change things up a bit.  I'm not sure I'll actually get to it, and I'm fairly certain if I do, they won't get delivered until after December 25th, but I'm considering it.  I still don't have an address book (hah, now that is a joke!), but I do have an address spreadsheet started in excel, and there are even a few addresses in it!  It may just be another road to hell (see: good intentions), but hopefully my friends know how important they are to me, even if I don't send them a Christmas card with a picture of Santa stuck in a chimney or whatever terrible card I would pick out this year.  Very fortunately for me, my friends have better taste than I do...  On that note, maybe I should spare everyone, scrap the whole idea, and revisit it again in 10 years.